Meditate or schedule alone time.Time For You

Many of us are raised with the value that we need to serve others. In order to be a good person, you may believe that you have to put your friends’ and family’s needs ahead of your own. You may find yourself always striving to please people and never having time for yourself. The next time you are feeling frazzled, ask yourself: is it really selfish to take care of myself? 

In an airplane the flight attendants often give the scenario that should the air masks drop in the case of an emergency, you need to put your own oxygen mask on first before you can assist someone else in need. You will pass out before you can help the person next to you! 

How is that different from everyday life? If you pass up your turn and let every other person cut the line in front of you, then when will it ever be your turn? There will always be another person in need and you will continue the cycle of putting them first until you make a conscious decision to allow yourself to join the line. 

We each are the authors to our own story. We are in charge of making sure our needs get met. If you are looking out for everyone else in your life, then who is looking out for you? You may say that the people in your life do the same for you. And you are lucky if that is true. Often when people find themselves in this helper role they tend to create a dynamic where they don’t want their family and friends to fuss over them or worry about them. They would rather the attention and focus be on those they love, which in turn leaves their own needs to be ignored and forgotten. 

People in this situation often find it hard to say no when someone requests something of them. They struggle with boundaries and often fear that if they set limits with people then those people may leave them or think less of them. 

Don’t be afraid to be yourself. You have a voice and you have the right to be heard. The people in your life that love you for who you are will feel more connected to you by truly knowing you. You will find out who your true friends are. Those that don’t like what you have to say will learn to adjust if they value you as a person. And if they don’t value you? Then are they really worth all of your effort to bend-over-backwards? 

You can learn how to feel confident and empowered, and to set better boundaries. For more information on this and other tips, follow my blog at Exploring Inner Peace or call me for a consultation on how I can help you or your loved one.


Brought to you by Therapist Lindsey Lowrance at Exploring Inner Peace. Lindsey is passionate about helping women get in touch with their inner resources to find health and happiness. Helping you Find Your Strength! For more information and free resources on mindfulness & trauma, visit:  Email: This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.  Phone: 720-243-3993
© Lindsey Lowrance 2016- This article MAY be shared or reprinted as long as the information is unedited and the author bio, including contact information is printed along with the article.